i dont know what to call this post...
i was out on friday night with friends when i got the worst call i've ever received in my life...
my best friend's mum had passed away very suddenly. she was like my 2nd mum and i just didnt know how to handle it all...
being out was torture... i just wanted to cry but i didnt want to ruin my friends' night. and then i just didnt want to be alone with my head. it was nice to be out.
for the first time in my life i thought about drinking away my sorrows... but i didnt get very far... only managed 3 drinks before just feeling terrible.
anyway, the friends i was with cheered me up... funny incident where clive was getting picked up by a guy at the bar... i caught it on video as well as having photographic evidence... sooo funny...
think the rest of the night was just getting lost in soccer...
i didnt manage to sleep at all that night cos i was just too upset... rugby the next day was a bit tough cos of no sleep.
sat night i was having ppl from church over to watch a movie and hang out... and i just wasnt sure whether i should cancel.
did go over to d's on sat arvo to see how the family are doing. i dont really know what to say or do... i want to be helpful but dont want to be in the way...
it was nice not to be alone sat night... just to feed of the energy of the people who came over. was a good night. we didnt end up watching a movie but just played a couple of light games and chatted.
the week is now a bit of a blur... every day has been busy with something. just feel like i'm going through the motions.
might just be that i feel so 'blah' today...
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